A day at the office with Mary Hannah Emery
As you may know, Mary Hannah is extremely bright for her age. The other
day, her mother was sick and so Mary Hannah bravely volunteered to go to work
for Amelia. Amelia works at the local newspaper in the classified
advertising department.
So Mary Hannah bravely set off and began a hard day's work. She
immediately began fielding phone calls on the super-duper hands-free headset
that was conveniently connected to the telephone. She brought her
special friend, Lucky Bear, along for moral support and advice.
The office
was a blur of motion as the day shifted into high gear. Mary Hannah took
25 garage sale ads in the first hour of business. Lucky was able to help
by keeping on top of the news. Unable to help herself, Mary Hannah glanced
at the clock... good thing she was wearing a diaper, because she didn't have a
moment to slip away to the baby powder room. Lunch hour couldn't come
quickly enough.
Taking off the headset, she began to crunch some numbers. She found that the inefficient accounting system, graphic design department and the coffee cart could all be streamlined to provide maximum efficiency. So, she wrote up a proposal to the general editor and with a look of determination on her face, she screwed up her courage and left a strongly worded note on the 15'' high to be done pile on the corner of his desk.
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She found that Mommy really has a tough job. Lunch was over and 5pm was
approaching, and with nothing left to do (Mary Hannah had already placed over 30
garage sales, 15 lost and founds, run testimonials, gained 4 service
directories, 10 help wanteds and a plethora of those annoying national ads that
say that you really can earn a living stuffing envelopes trying to dupe people
into stuffing more envelopes), she resorted to the tried but true method of
shuffling papers on her desk to look busy. She looked longingly at the
total of her commissioned earned as recorded on the calendar. Too bad
she'd have to wait two weeks till Mommy gets paid and 16 more years before she'd
really be able to spend the money.
A few quick clicks of the mouse and she published that day's run.
Unfortunately, the computer terminal informed her that there had been a critical
error on the server and she would have to quit the compiling process and
re-enter all the day's ads. Good think it was only 4:50. She had
plenty of time to get it done before she left at 5.
Mary Hannah's Top Ten Gripes about having to work for a living:
10. Having to commute without having a driver's license.
9. If you throw a temper tantrum, you run the risk of getting fired.
8. Being able to tell time doesn't make things happen any faster.
7. Co-workers calling Lucky a "Stuffed Animal".
6. Cubicles
5. Being forced to work on a Mac.
4. 5 day workweek.
3. Adults can't seem to communicate via telepathy and common sense the way
toddlers do.
2. Mommy and Daddy calling every 10 minutes to make sure she's O.K.
And the Number 1 Gripe Mary Hannah has about having to work for a living:
1. No Naptime!